Monday, 5 July 2010

England's alright.

Didn't actually write one post while I was away, isn't that funny.

Still baffled by how you can leave one place for a lengthy period of time, squeeze so much into that duration, yet return to the same place to find that NOTHING has changed, and everything is still in the same condition you left it in. That is of course, excluding the countries welfare being left in another wanky primeinisters hands (fuck off?).
In conclusion: Qantas is a time machine.

Anyway as I said; a lot was squeezed in. Boy did I squeeze.
But 8 months away is nowhere near enough, 3 months in Sydney is CERTAINLY not enough, and spending time apart from the surrogate family and friends I love is already proving to be too much. Therefore I've made the potentially life-altering decision to move there permanently this coming September. Thus leaving you all in the shit (re: this coalition governement) feel kinda guilty but mum, you can always downsize.

I miss you Sydney. Brighton; please don't feel insignificant or dispensable in anyway, I still love you. Just like in a different way, and not as much.

To end on a high here is a photo of Milo's pubes.

And that's what you get for hacking my password while I'm in the shower.

Saturday, 31 October 2009

thank goth for that

Firstly - Happy Halloweiner to the people in good costumes. ie. not those of you dressed as Robert Patinson or Kristen Stewart, a likely 1/2 of Englands population. Because 1. you'll look like a paley twat in fangs/a modern take H&M vampire and 2. you do not have the cheekbones, just saying.

Secondly, being a phattt hypocrit, I was going to go as Jacob Black at first. Only due to this incredibly inspirational make up tutorial i found on youtube of an asian guy giving himself an 8pack in the mirror using eyeshadow. But i didn't want to be smuggling peanuts in public/people to see me naked, 8 pack or not. 

In other news, I nearly drowned in a bowl of apples this week. Frantically bobbing for apples at Audio on Thursday night, got carried away when 'free shot' was mentioned. Thanks god for making me so attractive. Proceeded to come home at 4 with work the next day, and microwave fish fingers only to be rediscovered in there the following morning, and eat all the trick or treaters sweets, sorry mum.

Anyway for those of you who actually read this blog (thanks but why) you'll know I'm leaving in 3 weeks for NZ/AUS/USA, which in effect means I will have reason to post relevant blogs and you will actually have something worth reading, fingers crossed. Last couple of months here have been pretty good though despite having diagnosed myself with S.A.D.

There have been a couple of really good birthdays (mine) and failed attempts of surprise parties (Vian)
Some of my friends living in London were throwing Vian a surprise 21st(?) birthday party at their house so i went up for it, and on the way bumped into her, pretended i was chilling in the neighbourhood alone, subtly ran to their place but really no one had any idea what time they'd be back so we hid for about an hour in the silence of their pitch black living room, then when her and her girlfriend finally returned they went straight upstairs to have sex.

None the less was a brilliant weekend, was sick, passed out, woke up to party again tripped over composed party goers on floor and managed to defy gravity and spill a pint from underneath me on to my entire face. Once again, thanks god ;)

BASICALLY if you read between the lines you should get from this a. goodbye england b. ill miss you c. don't apple bob when intoxicated and boys claiming to be freelance apple bobbers are telling you to go hard and deep d. thinking about it ill people probably bobbed in there too which would explain my lingering cough and e. i shouldn't blog about shit like this, don't judge

bye y'alllll xxxx

Tuesday, 22 September 2009

Shitember 2009

Well, everyone has departed, gone their separate ways to london/foreign countries/counties whatever. I however, have began a full time job at Amex. I know what you're thinking - the phones. Well actually, it isn't. It's admin, so F you.

I booked flights yesterday for my travels, basically i've booked a return to one country and one country only (NZ hi emily if you're reading this) and then I just figured i could cancel/rearrange whenever i wanted/when i've found a boy(s) to drive me across the world/america. So it may appear casual and vague at the minute when in reality everything is going to plan.

Erm, to be quite honest not sure what my intentions were when creating this blog so i suppose i'd better write a bit about something first - Photos? i  have about 50 000 000 disposable films waiting to be developed no exaggeration so expect a couple of blogs before i go of shit quality images of things you can't make out.

a bit like these. peace x
PS i bought an iphone because i'm now a business woman, london on my weekend off. Pretty businesswoman like.

Saturday, 1 August 2009

gay day

ok so i really want to post a blog, but i want to wait until i get pictures back.
of brighton pride,
aka today,
aka ive been drinking for over 12 houra straight and have mud somehow up to my thighs and i looks like i've pood myself and it was really fun and butch lesbians are disgusting no offense tess(loveyou), but really the float was horrible. and now i have trenchfoot,
photos tomorrow. luvcha xxx

Friday, 31 July 2009

the bug upple

This time last year we had already accomplished Benicassim and were temporarily residing in New York. Best, holiday, ever. aka Brighton = one depressing mother effer.
In the US of A for some reason everyone thought our "british" accents were kiwi ones, eg
"so where are you guyses from in New Zealand?" "..errm.             what?"
we unwillingly overheard a lot of sex, Alice caressed a strangers hand on the subway because she thought it was mine, Milo got his arse pinched in china town because he's asian lookin', we got accused in McDonalds of stealing a woman's "fillayy" o' fish, and then in Ithaca.. for a cat that is strictly housebound, and a garden that is full of wilderness such a bears and other wild.. beasts, we probably let the cat escape a FEW (six) too many times. 
Alice was alergic to the cats.
We went speed boating down the finger lake at sunset that Whoopie Goldberg has a house on, don't thinkk we saw her.. Me and Alice couldn't go wakeboarding because we severely needed a poo. Other than that - was inCREDible.
wish i was back.

LARGEEE format

i love you.

but die

Dude looks like a lady.

Some of my final prints from our Final Major Project on the course i just finished, apart from they were all printed on to cakes, as in rectangular A4 sized actual birthday cakes. Sophie Rickett inspired; girls portraying repugnant male behaviour. Lap it up

Models: Mille Lily and Emily Hayler